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    Home » Psychotherapist explains why accepting praise feels uncomfortable

    Psychotherapist explains why accepting praise feels uncomfortable

    Reproduced only for reference to articles mentioning our name. All rights remain with the original publisher.

    People paying compliments usually underestimate how much the words mean to you
    Gossip HeraldGossip Herald Mental Health October 11, 20262 Mins Read1 Views
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    Chandni Tugnait, MD, psychotherapist, life alchemist, coach and healer, and founder and director of Gateway of Healing, says many people find it hard to accept praise because of specific psychological reasons that go beyond modesty. She explained the psychology to HT Lifestyle. Most people reach for a correction, a joke or a deflection almost on instinct when someone says something kind. A friend’s remark about your hair, for example, often draws a reply that it has not been washed in two days.

    Why being noticed feels exposing

    Tugnait said a compliment pulls a spotlight onto you, even if only for a second. Being seen, even in a flattering way, means being looked at and quietly assessed. For people who prefer to stay low-key, that attention can feel like standing in a room with the lights suddenly turned on. The blush, the laugh and the quick change of subject are small ways of stepping out of the spotlight.

    How past praise shapes your reaction

    If praise at home or school was rare, tied to results or followed by criticism, the mind learns to look for the catch. “As an adult, a kind word can set off a small suspicious thought, such as what do they want from me, even when the person means every word,” Tugnait explained. The body reacts to that old pattern before the thinking mind can step in. Generic compliments such as “you are amazing” rarely match how people see themselves, so they feel slightly untrue. Specific ones, such as praise for how you handled a tense meeting calmly, are easier to accept because they point to something real.

    Why compliment givers underestimate the impact

    Tugnait said the person paying the compliment usually sees it as a minor, passing gesture. Receivers tend to value it far more than the giver expects and remember it for a long time. Discomfort is often out of proportion to what was intended and says little about the sincerity of the kind word. “Remember, none of this means you must feel completely at ease the next time someone praises you. A simpler goal is enough, like try replying with a plain thank you and nothing else, and let the sentence sit there without correcting it,” she said.

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      emotional wellbeing Mental Health Mental Health Awareness Personal Growth Psychology of Emotions Self esteem Self worth Self-Awareness
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      Dr. Chandni Tugnait is the founder of Gateway of Healing, a TEDx speaker, Relationship Expert – Tinder India, NeuroEnergetic Transformation Coach, Psychotherapist, Life Coach, Business Coach, NLP Expert, and Healer. Over the past 15 years, she has transformed lives of more than 50,000 individuals through her work. Featured in over 500 leading media publications, Dr. Chandni is recognized for her expertise in mental health, personal growth, and relationships. Her mission is to empower people to achieve success and well-being through the alignment of energy, mindset and action.
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