Rebound Relationship: What Is It, Expert Insights On Signs And How To Avoid It

A Rebound Relationship often starts right after a breakup, acting as a temporary way to cope  with the pain. Unlike relationships that grow naturally, rebounds are usually formed without  much thought, simply trying to heal the emotional hurt from the past.

Have you ever seen someone get into a new relationship right after a breakup and  wondered if they were moving too fast? For example your friend’s partner is still  emotionally tied to their ex while being with your friend. These are common signs of  what experts call a ‘Rebound Relationship’. But what exactly does that mean? And more  importantly, how can you avoid falling into one? Let’s know about Rebound  Relationships in detail with expert insights from Dr Chandni Tugnait, MD (A.M)  Psychotherapist, Life Alchemist, Coach & Healer, Founder & Director, Gateway of  Healing:

What Is A Rebound Relationship?

A Rebound Relationship occurs when someone enters a new romantic relationship  shortly after ending a previous one, often without fully processing or healing from the  previous emotional attachment. These relationships are typically driven by the need to fill  the emotional void left by the ex, rather than a genuine connection with the new partner.

Dr. Chandni Tugnait explains, “What makes rebounds distinct is their timing and underlying  motivation. They often begin before the emotional dust of the previous relationship has  settled when grief still lingers beneath the surface. The new connection acts as a distraction,  filling the sudden void with fresh experiences and validation.” She further explains, “These  relationships typically mirror aspects of the past connection – either by stark contrast or  surprising similarity. Someone might choose a partner completely different from their ex to  prove they’ve moved on, or seek someone similar in an attempt to recreate familiar comfort.”

Signs You’re In A Rebound Relationship

As per Dr Chandni Tugnait, recognising a Rebound Relationship can be tricky, especially  when emotions are running high. Here are some signs to look out for: 

    i) You’re Still Emotionally Attached to Your Ex: If you find yourself comparing your new partner to your ex or constantly bringing up past memories, it might be a sign that you’re still holding onto your previous relationship. Dr Chandni Tugnait advises, “These comparisons might be favourable or unfavourable, but their persistence indicates unresolved feelings about the past relationship.” 

   ii) The Relationship Feels Rushed: Rebound Relationships often move quickly, with partners jumping into a commitment before taking the time to understand each other. If you feel like you’ve skipped essential stages of getting to know your partner, this may indicate that you’re rushing into things to fill a void. Dr Chandni Tugnait says, “The connection formed unusually quickly after a significant breakup, with intense emotional investment and accelerated intimacy. This rushed pace often reflects an attempt to recreate the emotional security of the previous relationship.” 

    iii) You’re Seeking Validation: If you’re using the new relationship to prove your worth or distract from the pain of a breakup, the foundation of the relationship may be built on insecurity rather than genuine love. Dr Chandni Tugnait points out, “There’s an intense need to prove how happy and moved-on you are, particularly on social media or in front of mutual friends. This behaviour often masks underlying insecurities and unresolved feelings.”

   iv) Your Feelings Are Unclear: Sometimes, you might not even be sure why you’re in the relationship. If you’re unsure of your feelings or whether you’re truly interested in your new partner, it may be a rebound. 

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How To Avoid A Rebound Relationship

While it’s easy to get swept up in the rush of a new connection, it’s important to take a step back and focus  on healing before jumping into another relationship. Dr Chandni Tugnait shares some valuable tips on how  to avoid falling into a Rebound Relationship:

   i) Three-Emotion Rule: When you’re attracted to someone new, take a moment to pause and identify three emotions you’re feeling. If any of these emotions are tied to your past relationship (like anger, loneliness, or revenge), it’s a sign that your motivations might not be fully aligned with what you truly need. In such cases, it’s best to rethink your intentions. 

   ii) Relationship Readiness Portfolio: Dr Chandni Tugnait suggests, “Collect evidence of your emotional stability – journal entries showing personal growth, new skills learned, challenging situations handled independently. Review this portfolio before considering new romantic connections.” 

   iii) 72-Hour Attraction Rule: When you meet someone new and feel a strong attraction, resist the urge to jump into anything immediately. Dr Chandni Tugnait advices, “To wait for three full days before making any decisions about pursuing them. This helps distinguish between genuine attraction and the need for emotional bandaging.”

   iv) Future Self Test: Write a letter from your future self, describing your ideal relationship. If your current dating motivations don’t align with this vision, it could suggest that you’re pursuing a relationship out of emotional need rather than a genuine desire for connection. 

Note: If you’re struggling with moving on after a breakup or feeling emotionally confused,  talking to a therapist or life coach can help. 

By focusing on personal healing and emotional clarity, you can create space for a healthy  and fulfilling relationship when the time is right.

For more such stories, stay tuned to HerZindagi. 

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