Vijay Deverakonda doesn’t like to travel alone: ‘7 out of 10 times, I love…’; how to embrace solitude

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Vijay Deverakonda loves having people around, which was a non-negotiable aspect of his childhood. In a recent chat, the Sahiba music video actor opened up about his home being called a ‘boys hostel.’ “7 out of 10 times, I love chilling at home. All my friends come home. They call my house ‘boys hostel’. I have a home theatre (room) where 15 boys can sleep. They come and stay overnight. There are mattresses that you have in hostels that can be folded. Then there are those days where you want to go out and feel the energy of the city with the same group of people,” said Deverakonda, 35. In an interaction with Curly Tales, he added, “But I can never travel alone. I grew up with 16 boys around always. The feeling of having a gang of friends around…I love people around.” Taking a cue, let’s understand why some people, who have always had people around them, don’t like staying or travelling alone. If you’ve grown up with a close gang of friends, you naturally want to keep hanging out with the same group. “It’s where you feel understood, where life makes sense. Your circle becomes your second home. Every weekend, major decision, trip — it’s always together. “Most people who grew up with people around struggle when suddenly faced with solitude. This isn’t a simple case of ‘not being used to it.’ It’s deeper. It’s emotional conditioning,” said Dr Chandni Tugnait, psychotherapist, life alchemist, founder and Director, Gateway of Healing.  

Why does being alone feel uncomfortable, even unsettling, at times?

“Your mind, accustomed to constant engagement, begins to race, searching for missing stimulation, making solitude feel unsettling and unfamiliar. That discomfort isn’t random. It’s the result of a life spent always engaged with external noise. When that noise fades, what’s left? Your thoughts, feelings, and unresolved emotions—things you’ve never had to sit with,” said Dr Tugnait. But solitude isn’t isolation. “Strong friendships are a gift. But so is the ability to be at peace in your own company. Because when you master solitude, you don’t need others to feel complete. You choose them from a place of wholeness. And that’s true freedom,” said Dr Tugnait. “It is the space where you meet yourself, free from distractions, and discover who you truly are,” Dr Tugnait mentioned.

How to embrace solitude

*Redefine alone time – Solitude isn’t about isolation. It’s about reconnecting with yourself. *Practice little moments of solitude – Start small: Try a solo coffee date, a quiet walk, or even a weekend-off social plan. *Reframe your narrative – Shift from “I am alone” to “I am with myself.” *Use solitude for self-discovery – What do you enjoy outside the group? Explore a new hobby, read, or journal your thoughts. *Embrace independence – Try a solo trip or spend time in silence. The more you do it, the more natural it feels. *Heal the root cause – If solitude brings up anxiety, it may point to unresolved inner wounds that need attention.

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